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2008
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February
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Smile For The Camera
02/27/08
A drug dealer decided to impress his friends by hiring a limousine for a big night on the town.
His first stop was at a posh suburban residence to sell some cocaine to a rather influential individual.
Hoping to earn a little extra profit by blackmailing his wealthy customer, th -
Going Through The Roof
02/25/08
A man decided to break into an office building by cutting a hole in the roof. Everything went according to plan until he became wedged in a crawlspace.
He got stuck and was trapped for several hours before passers-by heard his screams for help.
He was taken to a nearby Hospital -
New Area
02/23/08
Two brothers were visiting a new town when they decided they needed some drugs. The pair flagged down numerous cars and asked the drivers where they might find some crack cocaine.
The police were notified and, as you might guess, it wasn’t long before the brilliant brothers flagged down a -
He's Back
02/21/08
A man filled out a check-cashing card at a store he intended to rob. He wrote down his true name, age, social security number and current address. He returned 25 minutes later, walked up to the same window and demanded money from the same clerk. Then he became so nervous that he ran out of the store -
Pneumatic Tube
02/20/08
A couple of geniuses pulled into a bank’s drive-up lane, put their stick-up note in the pneumatic tube, pressed the button to send it in, then patiently waited in their car for the loot to arrive. The police arrived a few minutes later and arrested the pair. -
Masked Man
02/19/08
A first-time bank robber gave six $50 bills to a teller and asked her to exchange them for hundreds.
As she did, the man pulled a ski mask over his face and put his hand in his pocket, feigning a hidden gun.
When the teller looked up and saw the masked man, who was now demandin -
Serial Bank Robber
02/17/08
“We arrested a serial bank robber then arranged a line up. We had all the tellers and witnesses in to view the line up.
“I then proceeded to have them turn around and step forward. I asked each of the men to repeat the same phrase. When we got to number five, instead of saying what I aske -
Digital This
02/16/08
During a high school break-in two burglars found a camera in one of the classrooms and amused themselves by taking pictures of each other committing the crime. When they couldn't figure out how to get the film out of the camera, they concluded it wasn't loaded and left it behind. The men a -
Accidental Shooting
02/15/08
An unemployed sanitation worker in Miami is facing life in prison -- for shooting himself in the privates. In a drunken stupor, the man reached for a pistol he had hidden in his pants. The gun went off, and the bullet struck the man in the... nuggets. At first, he told officers someone else had shot -
The cops are looking for me
02/15/08
A man snatched a purse from two women in a parking lot, ran to an apartment house several blocks away and asked one of the occupants for help.
“You’ve got to help me. The cops are looking for me!”
The resident, a policeman enjoying his day off, showed the man his badge and gun -
Escape
02/14/08
A couple of inmates tried to escape from their medium security prison. They made a rope out of bedsheets and used it to scale a wall and climb down the other side. Unfortunately for them, the other side of the wall was still inside the prison grounds. They were promptly apprehended. -
Mommy and Clyde
02/13/08
A young man asked his mother to drive him to the bank without telling her he planned to rob it. He told her to wait while he went inside to conduct his business. A few minutes later junior came running out with the cash, only to find that mom had parked the car and gone inside a nearby grocery store -
Careless Shoplifter
02/13/08
A crook went into a department store to try on a pair of pants. He liked the pants so much he stole the pants, a shirt, a watch and $100 from the clerk. Unfortunately, he ran out without his wallet, which he’d put on a shelf while he tried on the pants. The wallet contained a photo of the crook, alo -
How About A Demonstration
02/13/08
A man walked up to two patrol officers who were showing their squad car computer to a group of children. When he asked how the system worked, the officers asked him for a piece of identification to use for demonstration purposes. The man gave them his driver’s license. They entered it into the compu -
Walkie Talkies
02/12/08
A group of burglars decided to use walkie talkies to pull off their biggest heist ever. The radios, they figured, would allow them to monitor the police as well as coordinate their own activities. It never occurred to the mental athletes that the police might be listening in. They were. -
Intoxicated Robber
02/12/08
When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber, the man threatened to call the police. They still refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.
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